Steven Harper Piziks

Christmas 2009

2009-12-27T04:35:13Z

Christmas morning arrived when Mackie tiptoed into the bedroom at 7:00 to inform us it was time to get up. He and Aran had already sorted all the presents. A flurry of opening followed. I got a huge sushi knife and much-needed clothes and the entire family got the Simpsons version of the Scene It game. Mwah ha ha!

I fed Aran's obsession with Monty Python by giving him a can of Spam, which he's never eaten before. He had some with his breakfast pancakes.

Later in the afternoon we went over to my in-laws for food and more gifting. Deliciousness all around! Mackie got a pogo stick, something he'd been agitating for since last summer. Aran got MONTY PYTHON AND THE HOLY GRAIL on DVD. He's watched it about fourteen times already.

The next day we drove up to my mother's for a celebration. It was a crowded house, with aunts and uncles and cousins and siblings and nieces and nephews. And food, food, food.

The gifting was fun. I received Terry Pratchett's latest book, a whole mess of organic granola, and The Charity Donation. Some of my family members, you see, decided to trade tailored charitable donations this year instead of buying gifts. I drew my brother Paul. Because Paul once packed a suitcase and started down the road to running away when he was six, I donated money in his name to Covenant House, a shelter for runaway youth. In memory of my childhood on a farm, my sister-in-law Kristi made a donation for me to Heifer International, which gives farm animals for hungry people to raise. Kala donated money to a pet shelter in the name of Kristi's recently-deceased dog, which made Kristi cry, so Kala won.

We also had a little celebration for Mackie and Caleb (my nephew), who have birthdays. Mackie is now eight!

Everything ended with a snow-free drive home, so yay!

Frankenmuth Visit

2009-12-27T03:04:53Z

On Wednesday we drove up to Frankenmuth.

Frankenmuth is an idealized version of Germany. It bears almost no resemblance to the reality. It's actually a big shopping area with various unique attractions in it, especially at Christmas. People come from all over the world to visit. Since I grew up only a few miles away, I don't understand the impetus to travel from, say, Japan just to see Frankenmuth (as some people do), but hey--it's a big world.

Frankenmuth's most famous attraction is Bronner's, an enormous shopping complex devoted entirely to Christmas. If it's related to Christmas, you can find it at Bronner's. Stuff is arranged by category, so we have five acres of nativity sets, three acres of ornaments, twelve acres of stockings, and so on. They also have on the premises a recreation of the little chapel where "Silent Night" was first written and performed. It's kind of a fun place to visit.

We were meeting my dad up there for a Christmas visit. We hooked up at the Silent Night Chapel and admired it. They have the lyrics for the song posted on signs in a bazillion languages outside it, including American Sign Language, braille, Latvian, and Ukrainian. Then it was a trip through Bronner's, though we didn't get to the entire store, not with a child under ten.

We had lunch at Zehnder's, famous for its chicken (which meant Aran ordered a hamburger). The place was very crowded, but fortunately they opened up another dining room just as we arrived. Once we'd ordered, Aran asked the server how many chefs they had working that day. "Two," he said. Mackie declared the chicken very good. Sasha, oddly, ordered a bowl of soup and some french fries. Usually he eats like a machine!

For Christmas I gave my dad two loaves of Latvian rye bread I'd made. He liked them very much. We also visited Zehnder's bakery for some more shopping. Aran bought a donut the size of his head. I saw some cookie cutters I liked very much (owl and wolf), but they were absolutely huge, too big to be practical, so I passed.

We drove around Frankenmuth after that, looking at the displays and talking and catching up. A good visit.

Comin' Through the Rye

2009-12-27T03:02:14Z

I grew up with lots of rye bread in the house because my dad's family came from Latvia, where they eat lots and lots of rye bread. My grandmother made it from scratch, and one time my mother asked her for the recipe so she could make it, but Grandma said she didn't really know it. "I just use a little bit of zis and a little bit of zat," she said.

I have better resources: the Internet. I Googled around, came up with five or six recipes for Latvian rye bread, and combined them. Ta da! Instant recipe. Probably not exactly like Grandma's, but close enough.

Latvian rye bread is a sourdough bread with no oil, fat, or eggs in it. This meant I had to start three days before I needed it because I don't have sourdough starter in my fridge, and I had to start with that. The second day, I made the bread dough. Here's where a mixer with a dough hook is really great--the dough is heavy as sand, and hard to work. The finished dough had to sour overnight, bringing me to the third day. Once it was done, I shaped it into loaves. You have to wet your hands to work with the stuff, which gives the dough an oddly soapy-silky texture on the surface, a side-effect of rye gluten. I let them rise and then baked them.

I was pretty sure I had it right because through the entire process, my kitchen started smelling like my grandparents' house. And here's the thing: I hate rye bread. It's awful, awful stuff. If I lived in Latvia, I'd starve. But I was making it anyway. It was a present for my dad.

They came out dense and seemed to have the right texture, but I had no way of checking because I hadn't ever made it before and I didn't like it when I was a kid, so I didn't eat it, meaning I don't know what the correct taste is. (I still don't like it--I can tell by the way the dough smells that I won't. But it wasn't for me!)

So, success!

Yule 2009

2009-12-27T02:35:40Z

Such a busy holiday season! Monday was Yule. Mackie requested lasagna for supper, which Kala made. And all day Maksim stoutly maintained that he would stay near me so I wouldn't have to disappear when Mother Berchta showed up. After supper we welcomed the God back into the world by putting his statue back on the altar and lighting candles all around the darkened house. When the pounding came at the door, I let Berchta in and Mackie dove under the afghan on the sofa. Berchta grumbled and griped and distributed gifts, then stomped away.

Sometimes you have to confuse the children to keep them on their toes.

Gifts were opened and enjoyed. The boys' favorite presents were little digital camcorders, complete with little memory chips. (Amazing how something the size of my thumbnail holds more memory than my entire first computer.)

The days are officially getting longer!

All the Colors of Love

2009-12-24T21:25:30Z

Oh wow--Anne Harris is serializing ALL THE COLORS OF LOVE: http://tinyurl.com/y8z9wu8 Go read this fabulous book!

Book View Cafe Spotlights Vonda McIntyre

2009-12-24T21:07:29Z

McIntyre Quartet Debuts at BookViewCafe.com

The STARFARERS quartet debuted at Book View Cafe on 20 December 2009. The four novels -- Starfarers, Transition, Metaphase, Nautilus -- will be serialized one chapter per week, and the full ebook versions made available for $4.99 each.

The episodes will be launched on Sundays at http://www.bookviewcafe.com/ and also available daily at McIntyre's bookshelf: http://www.bookviewcafe.com/index.php/Vonda-N.-McIntyre/Novels/

The Book View Cafe Blog conducted a spirited discussion of the unique genesis of Starfarers as "the best sf miniseries never made," and speculated about who might play the main characters. You can add your suggestions for the cast at "Casting Starfarers."
http://blog.bookviewcafe.com/2009/10/18/casting-starfarers/

Michigan Muskrats

2009-12-22T17:52:48Z

My home state of Michigan was mentioned in today's Dork Tower. Um . . . yay?

UPDATE
The DT site is down at the moment. Here's the link to the .gif: http://www.dorktower.com/2009/12/21/dork-tower-monday-december-21-2009-a-very-classic-musky-christmas-part-i/www.dorktower.com/2009/12/21/dork-tower-monday-december-21-2009-a-very-classic-musky-christmas-part-i/

Mackie's Present

2009-12-19T04:25:54Z

I got home from work late today, and when I arrived, Maksim was squirming with agitation. He had brought home a present for Kala and me and he was dying for us to open it. The wrapping paper he had decorated himself. It says "To my parents. Love, Maksim." We unwrapped it and found this hand-made frame: How can anyone top this for Christmas?

An Interview With Moi!

2009-12-19T03:44:27Z

The Outer Alliance did a great interview with me about the Silent Empire and the Shadow Conpiracy. Check it out: http://blog.outeralliance.org/. Way cool!

School Harping

2009-12-19T01:52:33Z

On the day before winter break, I always take Corey in to school and show him to my students. A harper-as-teacher always fascinates them, though I always find the day tiring--performing is very different from teaching!

This year was a first--a large number of my students used their cell phones to record me. They usually asked if it was okay. "Yes," I said, "but you can't post it on YouTube--I don't own the copyrights to some of the songs I play in class, so it would be illegal." I've never had so many kids recording. Of course, not that long ago most cell phones didn't have video recording capability.

We also had a potluck for the teachers at lunch. It was delicious! And I took Corey down to play, just for fun. I sat in the corner and ran through a few songs after I ate, and at one point, one of the teachers jumped.

"Steven!" he said. "I didn't know that was you! I thought it was a CD player."

Most of the student body knows I play the harp, but very few of the staff are aware of it. :)

House of Ill

2009-12-19T01:43:22Z

Monday afternoon, I started getting sick, and by evening it was clear I couldn't go in to work. Mizz-err-ab-el! I called in sick and spent Tuesday sleeping, reading, and watching TV. Tuesday evening I was still not feeling great, but I didn't want to call in two days in a row, so I went in and taught in a low-key kind of way. Kala arrived home and said she was feeling sick, with my exact symptoms. Sigh. So she called in for Thursday. All this made for a busy household. When one parent is sick, it means the other has to do everything. And you're always behind. For example, this is the first time I've been able to check e-mail, LiveJournal and Facebook since Monday!

The Shadow Conspiracy

2009-12-15T16:07:12Z

We did it! The Shadow Conspiracy went live this morning! It’s a shared world steampunk anthology, and it was a blast to write. My story “The Soul Jar” is a part of it. Go check it out!

You can find it at Amazon’s Kindle store at http://www.amazon.com/The-Shadow-Conspiracy-ebook/dp/B002YD8BWK or at Book View Cafe: http://www.bookviewcafe.com/ in a variety of e-formats. No DRM.

You can read a sample story from the anthology at http://www.bookviewcafe.com/index.php/News/A-Princess-of-Wittgenstein .

The cover blurb reads:

In the Year Without a Summer, a group of mad geniuses descended on Geneva. In an attempt to save the body and mind of George Byron, they performed a dreadful and forbidden experiment that forever changed history—and tore their own lives apart.

Years later, Byron’s daughter Ada has inherited her father’s genius. With Charles Babbage, inventor of the analytical engine, she invents the “automatic sciences,” allowing the creation of machines that mimic human action, and even human thought. Once again, history has changed. Mechanical spiders perform menial tasks. Intelligent locomotives keep their own time schedules. Massive dirigibles and flying automata have flung the Empire—and piracy—into the sky itself.

But even a golden age casts a long shadow, and silent forces are moving in the darkness. Whispers of a conspiracy to destroy the Empire are beginning to surface. The fate of the Geneva experiment and the mad geniuses that created it remains unknown.

And the fate of the world itself rests in the hands of Ada Lovelace.

In The Shadow Conspiracy, Book View Café’s lineup of bestselling, award-winning authors combines forces to create an unforgettable shared world of steam-powered science, fantastic magic, and dark conspiracy.

Here’s a snippet from “The Soul Jar”:

“Ferrous,” I said, “wake up.” Then I smashed him on the head with a sledgehammer.

The blow rang with the clang of a church bell. The great iron dragon’s eyes cranked open. He sucked in air and expelled soft steam through the horns on the top of his head. His boiler fires were banked, which always made him sleepy, and the blow I had dealt him was barely powerful enough to get his attention.

Ferrous was a huge black beast, a combination of dragon and locomotive, with wheels instead of claws and iron skin instead of scales. His strength was powerful enough to pull the massive circus train, and his codex complex enough to negotiate the maze of railways that snaked through the British Isles and the Continent. Kalakos had coded his cards, but I had modified them several times.

“Yes, Dodd?” Ferrous hissed.

Disney Outing

2009-12-13T19:08:11Z

Yesterday was a Disney outing for The Princess and the Frog. Weirdly, Aran didn't want to come, and Kala was only mildly interested, so it was just me, Sasha, and Maksim.

A small aside: I usually refuse to buy anything from the concession stand, but today I relented. A small popcorn, a medium soda, and a small slushy cost $15, the cost of two matinee movie tickets. I will never relent again.

The movie was decent. A solid event. For some reason, Disney decided against a show-stopping opening sequence. I'm unsure why--it gave the movie an extremely slow start. And the two main characters spent way too much time as frogs in the swamp. The music was lukewarm. None of it made me want to rush out and buy the CD. And did we really need =three= "We're travelling through the swamp" numbers?

That said, I liked the themes. The message here is, "Wishing for something is the first step. The second step is to work for what you want. Work, work, work, and work some more." I liked that the prince is a scoundrel who needs to be reformed. (A first there.) I liked the fact that Tiana's best friend and rival for the hand of the prince doesn't turn into crazy psychopath stepsister. (When Tiana accidentally falls into the pastry table at Lottie's party, thereby ruining Lottie's carefully-laid plan to get the prince's attention, Lottie's response is to hustle Tiana upstairs and get her into a new dress, not scream that her party is ruined.) In fact, Lottie is spoiled, but likeable--a neat trick. And for first time, we have a mother as advisor instead of a father! (Yes, I know Simba's mother lives in THE LION KING, but Serabi doesn't do anything of real importance.)

When one character gets killed, the theater fell quiet, and Mackie said, "Now they're going to bury him," into the silence, which everyone found very funny.

The twist ending was also nicely done.

Not one of the best, overall, but worth seeing.

So Many Waffles

2009-12-13T18:46:58Z

Yesterday I cooked up some home-made waffles. I made a double batch of batter, but that filled a two-quart pitcher all the way to the top! I cranked out a high stack of golden brown deliciousness, but had over half a pitcher of batter left. Pause for eating. Said waffles were filling, much more so than the wimpy toaster variety found at the supermarket, and no one was able to eat more than two, even Aran. (!) This was where Mackie said, "It's good to eat hot waffles on a cold morning."

After everyone was done, I reheated my cast-iron burner-top waffle iron and cranked through the rest of the batter, generating an even huger stack. These went into the freezer for other days.

4,5,6

2009-12-12T02:03:21Z

Stayed after school until 3, home at 4, made pizza for supper at 5, brain dead by 6.

Recovering Ukrainian Roots Through Garlic

2009-12-09T02:21:48Z

Sasha has been reliving his Ukrainian childhood lately--by eating salted raw garlic.

We first encountered this treat in Ukraine when Irene, our housekeeper, made borscht. You peel a clove of garlic, dip it in coarse salt, and eat. Sasha has been doing this quite a lot lately, and Mackie has followed suit. It's been rather . . . unpleasant to stand close to him.

AT&T: The Racist Phone Company

2009-12-07T23:20:46Z

My brother pointed out this one as all kinds of racist:

(Incidentally, did you notice the number of times the little AT&T symbol of progressive bars shows up in the background as bits of architecture, or stacks of cups, or . . . ?)

My brother also mused whether the racism was purposeful or merely clueless. What racism?

"Every person holding a mobile device in this spot is white. Each become part of the plan to help tall whitey help po li'l black chil'. Meanwhile, the black folk are relegated to analog ignorance in every scene. Sure, Mr. Hansbrough's character hangs with some brothers, but they appear to be oblivious to his charitable act. One quick scene has a white woman showing her phone display to a black woman, as if to ask if she's seen the dog. The sista cluelessly shakes her head no.

"Eventually, the dog surfaces with three young people - two whites, one black. Guess who's transfixed by her mobile device? The white girl, of course. She got the Twitter update and immediately recognizes the dog! What's her black friend doing while the white girl solves the mystery? Petting the escaped dog and smiling her clueless ass off."

At first I was willing to put write it off as clueless racism, but after watching it a couple times more, I took it back. How often did this go through editing? How many eyes went over it? Images in commercials are never there by chance, as the "more bars" architecture in the same ad clearly demonstrates, and the image of a bunch of smart white people using their fast, hi-tech network to help a disadvantaged black child is simply too strong and too overt to be anything but on purpose.

AT&T: Racist phone company to the NBA.

Decorating, 2009

2009-12-07T23:13:14Z

For Sunday we'd promised Maksim that we'd get the Yule tree, and so we did.

First we had to straighten up and arrange various bits of furniture and bring the boxes up from the basement. Then we went off to get a tree. This was lots easier with a van! We found The Perfect Tree at the farmer's market we usually go to and got it set up with minimal fuss. Decorating followed.

By now the boys are old pros at it. They set up the house decorations wile Kala and I did the lights, and then it was ornaments and other stuff. It all looks luvverly!

Saturday Date

2009-12-07T23:08:53Z

On Saturday, Kala said to me, "We're going ooooouuuutt!" And so we did.

We abandoned the children (oh, the joys of having older offspring) and headed off into the wilds of Ann Arbor to hunt down food. The places we wanted to go were too expensive for a season in which you're buying presents, and the places we could afford to go didn't appeal. And it was cold! The thermometer read 35, but a killer wind tore the heat right out of you.

We ended up at Habana, a Cuban restaurant that was new to us. I had fish tacos, and Kala had a seafood enchilada, and both were very good.

From there, we processed across town to the comedy club in the basement of Seva. We enjoyed the show quite a lot. V. funny.

Then we scurried back across town to the parking structure to the car. It felt like midnight, but it was only 9:30! We thought about going somewhere else, but decided to head back home.

Chapter Four

2009-12-07T18:13:19Z

Today's Special from Steven Harper: - new chapter in Nightmare - read it for free at http://www.bookviewcafe.com

Da Verbs

2009-12-07T18:10:19Z

Guest blogging today at BVC. Topic: tips on strengthening your writing with the right verbs. Includes a certain amount of barfing.

http://blog.bookviewcafe.com/

Eating Machines

2009-12-05T15:30:19Z

This morning, I made pancakes for breakfast. I made a triple batch of batter, intending to freeze the extras. They're perfect in the toaster during the week and make great quick breakfasts.

Aran wandered into the kitchen. "You're making pancakes?" he said. "I already ate pancakes. There were a couple in the freezer from last time, and I ate them while you were in the shower. But," he hastened to add, "I'm still hungry."

The final tally? Counting the pancakes Aran ate before breakfast, it was:

Maksim: 3
Aran: 8
Sasha: 9
Kala: 3
Me: 3

There were no extra pancakes for the freezer . . .

Chris Dolley

2009-12-05T15:23:23Z

BookViewCafe.com conquers Europe as science fiction author and memoirist, Chris Dolley, joins the team. Originally from the UK, but now living in France, Dolley has had two SF novels (Resonance and Shift) published by Baen. Currently he is working on a true crime memoir based on his own experience of having to track down the thief who stole his identity and life savings when he moved to France. He describes it as “A Year in Provence with Miss Marple and Gerald Durrell.”

For his debut, Dolley will be offering the first episode of Resonance, serialized especially for BVC. He will also be blogging on the topic of romance -- sheep style, and posting his spam email story -- Nigerian Tuna Spam -- which begins: I'm Fluffy the favourite kitten of the late president of Nigeria...

Visit Dolley’s bookshelf at BookViewCafe.com: http://www.bookviewcafe.com/Chris-Dolley-Bookshelf/

Watch for future offerings from Dolley on Saturdays at http://www.bookviewcafe.com.

Table Conversation

2009-11-30T23:17:03Z

For supper today I made fish sticks, french fries, and fruit salad mixed with leftover Cool Whip.

"This meal wasn't so much cooked as assembled," I remarked at the table.

"I want more," Sasha said, reaching for the fruit.

"Sometimes it bothers me," I said, "that I don't know how to butcher a pig or a cow, though I could probably do a chicken if I had to."

"Sometimes it bothers me," Kala said, "that you think about things like that."

"In my country," Sasha put in, "we killed pigs every year. We stick something in their chest, into their heart. They squeal for a long time, and then they finally die. Then we burn the skin to . . . to . . . "

"To get the bristles off?" I supplied.

He nodded. "Yeah. That's it. You know what my favorite food from a pig is?"

"What?" I asked.

"I don't know the name," he answered. "But you take the tubes from inside the pig and fill them with blood and cook them and eat them."

"That's blood sausage," I said.

"Yep," Kala said.

"It's delicious," Sasha said.

"Where the heck would you get blood sausage around here?" I asked.

Kala shrugged. "No clue. Zingerman's?"

We have some of the weirdest conversations at our table. And now we have to track down a supplier for blood sausage.

Train Wreck

2009-11-27T23:30:58Z

I . . . I can't look away! http://www.peopleofwalmart.com